Wonder Why?

In my opinion one of the most farsical events of the year has to be the Republic Day parade. I can really picture what President Putin must've been thinking during the parade:"I am the one who is going to dictate the energy policies of all of Europe and what the hell am i doing here watching ...what do they call it in english...oh yeah...Floats! All i see is people running up and down this pretty good road...boy why didn't i get to travel on this road today, sought of constipated after going to hyderabad house or is it lucknow house...bahhh who cares, i am not supposed to be speaking english. Back to the floats...got to admit these indians do make colourful floats..it's all very fascinating...fascinating but dull. It's a good thing that the hairy old man...what's his name...oh yeah Kalam...it's good thing that Kalam seems to enjoy all this. I don't know if he will take it the wrong way but i hope he has a haircut i can't even have eye-contact with him, it's quite embarrasing...i mean my mom(where is she by the way?) always told me that a man worth his salt must keep eye-contact..but i am not able to".

As Putin dozes off...he gets a tap on his shoulder from the blue turbanned man," Sir i know this is a little lame but what to do, we have to sure that we have a fiscal deficit, sought of a cover up for all the scams by our alliance members". Putin though visibly disturbed by the blue turbanned man took a few breaths to compose himself and then opens his mouth and whispers "vodka".
"What sir?" enquire BT man.
Putin clears his throat and says," naa nothing" in fluent russian.
"Uhh what?" asks the BT man again now looking a bit annoyed at the translater.
Putin gesture as to say everthing is alright and then thinks :
"Oh god...what have i done..came to sign a civilian nuclear deal and this is what happens.Hey look there is almost 50 men on that bike...WOW! How did they do that. Bet my boys back home can't do this". He looks to his right and wonders," Why is the blue turbanned man always looking down at the guests...and that too at that italian woman" He then turns left and is thinking," Why is the hairy old man...K...a..lam...yeah Kalam...why is he smilling at those jets, wait a minute they are from my country, yea baby....oh no he is looking at me....what do i do..what do i do?? ". He smiles at Kalam who returns the favour,"Phew that was close...Now where was i...oh yea the jets...they are mine what are they doing here".

And in that manner our guest of honour spends his entire day in the republic day parade..and mind u this is not the only such case. Remove the vodka and the jets and we have the predicament of every guest of honour...Jai Hind!